App, dating site or matchmaker? What each costs and who it suits

If you're ready to meet someone and wondering where to put your time and money, here's the short answer: no single option wins. Free apps cost the least money and the most of your time. Paid dating sites charge a monthly fee, add a bit more structure and are built around finding something serious. Matchmakers cost the most by a long way and ask the least of your evenings, because someone else does the searching.

So the right choice comes down to three things: how many hours you have each week, what you're comfortable spending, and how much of the choosing you want to do yourself.

You'll have company whichever you pick. In a 2023 Pew Research Center report, 37% of adults aged 30 to 49 said they had used a dating site or app, along with 20% of those 50 to 64 and 13% of those 65 and older (Pew Research Center). Among married or partnered adults, 10% met their current partner that way (Pew Research Center). And paying is common: 35% of people who have tried online dating have paid for it at some point, rising to 41% of users aged 30 and older (Pew Research Center).

Below are the three side by side, listed from lowest cost to highest, which is the only order we've put them in. Prices change often and many only appear inside an app or after a consultation, so each one comes with the date we found it. Check before you pay.

Free apps

Tinder, Bumble, Hinge and their cousins are free to download and free to use at a basic level. You make a profile, look through other people's, and chat with anyone who likes you back.

What it costs. Nothing, unless you want extras. The big apps sell paid tiers that let you see who liked you, send more likes or get shown to more people. Hinge, for example, keeps its regular version free and sells Hinge+ and HingeX subscriptions, plus one-off extras called Roses and Boosts (Hinge). When Android Authority checked Tinder's US prices in November 2025, the standard paid tiers ran from about $17 to $50 a month, depending on the tier and how many months you bought at once, and the site noted that prices can vary with your location and age (Android Authority). Check the app itself for today's price.

Time it takes. This is the real cost. You do all of it: the browsing, the first message, the back-and-forth, the planning. Five minutes over morning coffee can quietly turn into an hour every evening. A simple rule helps. Give it 20 minutes a day, and once a chat has gone well for a week or so, suggest a phone call or a coffee.

How people are checked. It depends on the app, and the badges mean different things. Bumble lets members verify with a photo of a government ID, shows a badge on verified profiles, lets you sort for ID-verified people and lets you ask a match to verify (TechCrunch). Hinge's Selfie Verification uses a short video selfie to show that someone looks like their photos, and in some regions Hinge now requires a biometric Face Check (Hinge). That's useful, but a face match doesn't tell you someone's name, and no badge tells you about anyone's past.

Suits you if you have some free evenings, enjoy chatting, like being in charge of who you talk to, and would rather spend time than money.

Worth knowing. People are on apps for different reasons. In Pew's survey, 44% of current or recent users said meeting a long-term partner was a major reason they were there, and 40% said the same about casual dating (Pew Research Center). If you want something serious, say so on your profile. It saves everyone time, you included.

Paid dating sites

Match, eharmony, SeniorMatch and similar sites usually let you look around for free, then charge for the things that matter most, like messaging freely. In AARP's review of several, updated in October 2026, every site it looked at had a free version with limited features (AARP).

What it costs. Expect a monthly price that drops the longer you commit. As of AARP's October 2026 review, Match's Platinum plan started at $39.99 a month, sold in three-, six- or 12-month commitments (AARP). eharmony's Premium Plus cost $89.90 a month on a three-month plan, $65.90 on six months and $43.90 on 12 months, and SeniorMatch charged paid members $33.99 a month (AARP). Look closely at how you're billed, too. AARP's separate Match review notes that members are charged for the full term up front, in one payment (AARP). If your plan renews automatically, put a reminder in your calendar a week before it ends.

Time it takes. More at the start, a little less after. eharmony asks new members to fill in an 80-question questionnaire about their values, habits and relationship preferences (AARP). After that, the site suggests matches, but you still do the reading, the writing and the planning, so set aside a few hours a week.

How people are checked. Usually more than nothing, and less than you might hope. In AARP's review, Match used text-message and photo verification, eharmony used text-message verification, and SeniorMatch used a live camera check at sign-up to confirm that your face matches your photos (AARP). A text check proves someone has a phone number. It doesn't prove who they are.

Suits you if you want a committed relationship, still like to do your own choosing, and don't mind a monthly fee. Sites built for people over 50 suit anyone who is tired of setting age filters and still seeing people half their age.

Matchmakers

A matchmaker gets to know you, learns what you want and introduces you to people they've chosen. You don't scroll at all.

What it costs. The most of the three, and prices are rarely posted online. Many firms only give you a figure after a consultation. One published example: AARP's October 2026 review found that Tawkify's packages start at around $4,900, can retail for more than $30,000, and last six to 12 months (AARP). At the top of the market, some high-end firms charge over $100,000 for VIP service (RetirementLiving). Some services price things differently and charge per match instead of a package (Global Dating Insights), so ask exactly what your money buys.

Time it takes. The least of yours. Expect one long first conversation about your life and what you're looking for, and then mostly waiting. AARP's testers found that Tawkify committed to one or two matches a month, and the matchmaker planned and scheduled the first meeting (AARP). You'll go on fewer dates, with more thought behind each one.

How people are checked. This is where matchmakers can do the most, and where they differ the most. Tawkify, for example, requires a criminal background check for all users (AARP). Ask each one what it checks, and whether every person you could be introduced to went through the same checks.

Suits you if your time is scarce, you're a private person, or you've tried the apps and want a human being in the middle. It also suits people who are happy to give up some control. You'll meet fewer people, and you won't be the one picking them.

Worth knowing. A matchmaking contract can run to thousands of dollars and several months. Read every page before you sign, get the refund and cancellation terms in writing, and if the amount is large, it's reasonable to ask a lawyer to look it over first.

Which one fits your week

Ask yourself three questions, and answer them for the life you have right now.

How many hours can you give it? If you have several free evenings a week, an app or a paid site will reward that time. If you have an hour or two at most, a matchmaker makes more sense, or a single app used with a strict daily limit.

What could you spend each month without minding? If the answer is nothing, start with a free app. If it's roughly the price of a dinner out, a paid site or a paid tier on one app fits. If you can set aside thousands of dollars over several months, a matchmaker is on the table.

How much do you want to choose? If you like to pick for yourself, apps and sites give you that. If you'd rather someone else narrowed it down, that's what a matchmaker is for.

Mixing is fine. You could keep one free app on your phone and go to a singles event once a month. And if none of the three appeals yet, our guide to where people over 40 are meeting now covers speed dating, supper clubs, classes and more.

Before you pay anyone, ask these

Whichever you choose, run through this list first.

• Can I try a free version or a short trial before I pay?
• How long is the commitment, and is the whole amount charged up front?
• Does it renew automatically, and how exactly do I cancel?
• How are members checked: phone number, photo, government ID or a background check?
• For a matchmaker: how many introductions will I get, where do those people come from, and what happens if a match isn't right?
• What is the refund policy, and can I have it in writing?

For anything bigger than a monthly subscription, you could say: "Before I sign, could you email me the full contract and your cancellation terms? I'd like a day to read them." A good service won't mind.

One rule holds across all three. Never send money to someone you haven't met in person, however you were introduced. Our guide "I think I'm being scammed" lists the warning signs.

Where to start

If you're still torn, pick the option that fits the week you have, give it a month, and see how it feels. You can always change course.